What is this life if…

What is this life if full of distraction, you don’t find the time to write with passion? Many a day, I feel the urge to pen away. On what? No particular topic. Just anything and whatever the topic, I want to have fun with it, the words, and my thoughts.

But distractions-everyday ones and others come in the way and one thing leads to another. Before I know it, my day is done and nothing found expression through my pen. So today, I thought that almost the first thing I should begin with is this. Give vent to my expressive side in writing. Well, I do make noise and do other things to express myself; don’t get me wrong! But using the written word, I seem to skip. 

So, I walk to my balcony, and sitting on my old sturdy wooden chair, I notice cloudiness. The sky is dull, leaves rustle somewhat, birds are rather quiet while one koyal bird sings. I hear a few crows at a distance and admire morning walkers, vegetable vendors rushing their wares to their stalls in the market, an elderly man climbing the steps of a bus ever so carefully, cyclists, motor bikers, some lines, some couples, and such.., all happening this one morning… 

Life just started to buzz say this Sunday morning. I could not help but notice that the loudest sounds are man – inspired. Busses and cars honk, and one loud – mouth yells out to his long lost buddies who eventually bring tea to sip with him. Engines and breaks of busses, big and small tempos, motor bikes, auto rickshaws rudely interrupt the relative peace of the morning.

Kolkata is coming out as I write while a part of the sky goes darker than the rest. Lovely breeze blows. Hah! And two youngsters walk to their cricket practice with cricket bat and stumps in their hands. 

Oops! My tea is waiting to be sipped. 

Cheers, world. Until next time!

-Jagjit

Evening thoughts

This night, peaceful and relaxed
No wind, nor clouds
But a few cars, usually quiet
Driving to where they want to go.

I hear the nightly insects’ hum
I know not where it emanates
Cycles, some, one or two
And sounds of tires and engines interrupt.

At times.
But it’s mostly serene. And my thoughts wander
To peace in my heart and love for all
A satisfaction and a desire still
An aspiration for joy and hope
And success in my new endeavors.

Cheers!

-jagjit

To write or not to write!

  • Penned after Nov 6, 2016, as I sat on my sofa day in and day out…

Now that I have ample time on my hands, it would be best to make a memoir of my free time without a job, but with my right foot in an Aircast and only my thoughts or the TV news and shows in North America.  I began to write a few days ago when my foot was still in its normal version of being!  And, since I was still mobile (I am even now, as promised to the world around me, but excruciatingly slow and painstakingly bumpy), I fell out of inspiration to write anymore.

Well, I am back today.  I feel as if I am in full force at least at this moment.  So, instead of continuing my journey of writing and going further on what I started to pen down (or bang away really, on my keyboard) a few days back, I think I will put down my thoughts and experiences of my stay in Calgary this time around.  Why? Because it has been quite momentous in many ways!

First, I came here in June to attend a conference in Atlanta in the States and after a few days, fly back to my mama in India. But as it happened, one day after I arrived in Calgary, I received an e-mail from my university that they want to speak with me the next day.  I knew it!  I knew that the axe was falling on me as it had been falling on many of my colleagues over the months.  Yes, that is what happened- as of 3 weeks from then, I was to be work-free! That was one big event of my stay.

Next, I enjoyed a few weeks of Atlanta hopping (all my expenses would be paid for the conference by my university; God bless them!) and my new- found freedom during which one of my off-springs bought us a great holiday in Vegas.  Unfortunately, the story in Vegas must wait for a bit until I have literally spilled all the beans of my visit.  Then, I started to look for online jobs, thinking they would be easy to find and I would return to Kolkata to be with my mom and work on one or two small online teaching jobs. But that proved to be tough!  Meanwhile, my mommy informed me that she did not want me to return as there were many cases of Dengue being discovered in Kolkata and I could easily catch the infection since I was protected by a powerless Canadian immunity now (chuckle!).  That was followed by the diagnosis of another 2 -3 types of illnesses in Kolkata and rest of India due to the sultry hot weather.  So, what did I do here? Sent out my CV and cover letter galore – you name it and I sent them.  No job yet!

Okay it wasn’t so blah all the time!  It was dandy actually!  My fam took a quick trip to Banff, I invited my friends over for a dinner, and I met friends one after another for lunches and dinners.  I went for photo-shoot to a renowned New York style photographer (courtesy, my daughter) and to the club with my friends (courtesy my daughter) while I plugged away also at the gym, taking care of the other aspects of my being.

The situation in India, primarily in Kolkata, was still very grave with Dengue, Chikungunya (I had not even heard of the latter mosquito borne infection before September 2016) and Foot, mouth and hands disease.  So, I was banned from returning to Kolkata by my indomitable mom once again.  Well, I do understand her sentiments and caution!  But, do you know how many times I booked my flight and ignored my booking or changed them or cancelled them without buying the tickets?  Perhaps about 15 times from June to November!  My son proclaimed that had he been my travel agent, he would have blacklisted me!

The final doozy came when I planned to have these special prayers in the house for the happiness, health, success, and contentment of the family.  I postponed it once because it seemed that my children where going to be all over the place and would be available that day but would have been very exhausted anyway.  And since I was not flying back to India very soon any more (remember the 3 kinds of infection scenarios in Kolkata?), I postponed the date for the prayers by a week.  Well, that is when this doozy happened.

I broke the 5th metatarsal of my right foot…  Yes, yes, you have read the ‘chronicles’ in my previous blogs.  I will spare you the agony of perusing the details once again; no worries!

Ta da until next time!

  • jagjit

Feeling blessed

20160809_214133T’was a night before Diwali and 2 nights before Halloween.  Sitting by myself in my living room, I was caught reminiscing about my life and how grateful I was for this very calm and comfortable existence.  My son had gone out of the city for a 10-day retreat of sorts and my daughter was out for some pre-Halloween fun that evening.  Well, my reminiscing started even before I found myself alone in my living room.

Driving back from the gym after an hour of rigorous cross-trainer and spin cycle cardio work and stretching, I was wondering how I would occupy myself that evening when my daughter would leave with my car to meet her friends.  I looked at the sky above and cars whizzing by and felt overcome with emotion at what God had provided for me.

I felt overly content and blissful at the thought that God is kind.  I had just turned an undisclosable (not a word, you say?) age, had just sort of left my rigorous online teaching work, and had 2 beautiful children who were working and sharing their life with me.  I have a beautiful mother who loves me so dearly, a loving and doting father in heaven, who we miss very much, a comfortable life and home in India where I go every now and then, and a fine healthy body and mind (this was written before my fracture J).

I felt the urge to pen down my thoughts that evening. I was happy, I was grateful, I was at peace.  Not that everything in my life was peachy-keen, though.  This existence would be too boring and taken for granted if we had everything that we ever needed, don’t you think?  We would feel entitled and would possibly not even remember that there is a higher power looking down on us and vouching for us.  Nevertheless, I knew that I would feel productive and satisfied if instead of watching the Trump/Clinton circus or a movie or two on TV, I would express my utter love for all I have, in writing.

I am thankful, through the events and struggles and reflective months and years gone by, that I have grown to be a persistent hopeful and consistently (almost) positive individual.  Why? And most importantly how? I don’t know!!

Suffice it to say that the many years of my personal down time forced me to assess me and everything I stand for, and to pray for strength, courage, determination, intelligence, calmness, and faith.  I found that slowly but surely, I gained the strength I desperately needed and the confidence to stay in tune with my goals.  I have matured, I think, although I do have some amusing expectations of life that I will opt not to pen down here.  Simply stated though, there is still a young woman inside of me that wants fun, laughter, dancing, friendships, outings, travel adventures, a caring hand on my shoulder, and bear hugs to come and go, among other things on my bucket list!

But, I cannot simply go through a day and night without the thought that I am truly blessed.

Don’t we all have something to be grateful for?  It’s a case of glass half empty versus a glass half full.  Just staying positive, ahead, and cheerful creates a present that is worth living and working hard for- whether in terms of love or money, spirituality or thought.  A peaceful country to live in, a good family to belong to, a healthy intelligent mind to be productive with, a usually calm demeanor that keeps your mood in check, loving friends to share your idiosyncrasies with, a comparatively strong body to ward off evil (!), despite the other not so happy accompaniments (like my recent fracture and loss of job), are somewhat overwhelming truths about us that we must be thankful for.  In my case, even the loss of job I considered as a gift because now I have something very interesting to pursue and my fracture made me realize that I have to slow down.  It also made me appreciate what I have and what I had.

Without a doubt, a glass half full is a better perspective than that of a glass half empty. If my short note here on feeling blessed inspires even one person out there to be positive, I will be thrilled!

Cheers, everyone!

Waiting

Had to wait today and yesterday, not for anything very pleasurable or unique. It was a wait for an orthopaedic doctor at a hospital. No, I am not disclosing where, because that for now, is irrelevant.

I often prize myself for being patient most times. Wiling away time at airports and doctor offices, twiddling my thumbs when waiting for visitors and officials, and waiting for my children to return from their occasional get togethers, is my forte.  Although the last one has often made me somewhat nervous, I think I have been quite cool and collected in these situations. Is that because I am inherently lazy and lackadaisical, and lack a sense of urgency? No, no. Not at all! I always bring something useful and of personal interest to me to do, as I wait. Like right now, as I wait for the ortho surgeon, I opted to pen down my thoughts on ‘waiting’ and philosophize on the art and science of waiting.

What is this phenomenon called ‘waiting’? To me, it seems to be the art of postponing the here and now, the urgent, the immediate, and the art of exercising one’s patience, fortitude, and positivity to think kindly of what is to come. Anticipation of the outcome of the’ wait’ has to be a measured response to the Tick Tock of your particular timer, whether the latter is on your wrist on a watch or on a fit bit, on your smart or un-smart phone, or on the wall in the path of your vision. A number of emotional variables are at play here. The more one has to wait, one must be able to attribute the delay to extraneous factors rather than to carelessness or letharginess of the person or thing you are waiting for.

It all boils down to your understanding of the extenuating conditions of the thing or person responsible for the thing you are waiting for.  You may wait for your printer to start, your flight to arrive, your doctor to show up after their rounds, your spouse to finally be ready, or for your fracture to start healing (grrr)!

Emotional intelligence! Yes, understanding of your emotional state and monitoring it, and understanding the emotions and circumstances of others, is crucial. You need to be able to empathize with the situations and internal dispositions of others, and thus, use all this to be good at maintaining relationships.

So, who are the ones that find it tough to wait? Personality type A, for sure. Folks that have a Type A personality have this keen sense of time urgency, are very particular about getting things done on time and tend to get somewhat angry, impatient and hostile with people who don’t do things right and on time. ‘Waiting’ is absolutely not in the preferred vocabulary of type A individuals.  Words and expressions such as ‘hang fire’ , ‘mark time’ , ‘kill time’ , ‘cool one’s heels’, and the like are not favored by any means.  No wonder some folks get explosive of they are asked to wait.

All in all, however, depending on where you reside, you get used to the ways of the surroundings. Highly productive cultures and high performance establishments cannot afford to sit quietly waiting for things to happen. Individuals there have to be proactive and go-getters. They do not thrive if asked to linger and delay. On the other hand, those who can master the art of patience and can relax and tarry while the world tries to figure out what needs to go on next, thrive in conditions where people are laid back and calm.

It’s all a matter of wait and see, I suppose! Normally, I ‘enjoy’ waiting because it gives me a chance to get away from the rat race of doing this and that and keeping scores on time, and rushing hither and thither. I get immense pleasure of just winding down and being creative any time I have to wait. Previously, I used to take my work like my marking, my laptop, my lesson plans or a text book and kill the wait time that way. Now, I take a book to read, a note book to write my thoughts in, or my smart phone to call people and be creative with relationships. As I said elsewhere, it’s good to be able to adjust one’s expectations and go with the flow. To wait and how to wait. Not, to wait or not to wait!

For the first time

Yes, it was the first time.  The first time in many respects. It was the first time that I turned (?) years old (not disclosing) and closer to that date, I proclaimed to my kids that for another 10 years, I want to do things I have never done before.  Things I probably would not have even thought of doing many years ago.  Time flies when you are having fun, right?  And time has flown for me, slogging with work, burning the midnight oil, and caring, loving, scolding, cooking for, yelling at, but definitely cherishing all these times I spent with my kids.  Hence I wished to kick it up a notch and collect some exhilarating memories as I grow wiser.

So, to come to the ‘firsts’. I do have a list of ideas in my bucket, of which some were conceived by my daughter.  So, I went for an exciting photo-shoot, to visiting a couple of clubs in the city, to having massage from a professional well-trained masseur, which were all fun firsts and arranged by my illustrious daughter. Then, was the highlight of falling to a fracture of the mid-shaft of the fifth metatarsal on my right foot with displacement of about 3 mm! If that is not the most paradoxical first, even though it is not exactly pleasurable, then I don’t know what is!   Aside from setting me back a few months already and not wanting to budge from it’s very stubborn state of non-healing, my fracture is quite painless.  That makes it that much more odd!  I just wanted to get this out there so that you don’t start feeling toooo sorry for me.

Yes, it is painless.  It did not swell up like a ball that others have complained about their fractures, neither does it nor did it pain.  So, is it really a fracture?  This is what others have asked me.  Yes, four X-rays in a span of 2 months have confirmed the broken state.  3 mm displacement- you got that, right?

Anyway, because of it, I had been mostly house bound in Calgary for two months after the fracture day, other than the occasional outing for a doctor’s appointment or restaurant for dinner or coffee.  The third appointment with the hospital surgeon was a disaster just as the previous two times had been.  In the second appointment I was told to refrain from using my crutches– as if that was easy to do.  You see, because I was hopping all around the house making my tea and toasting a slice of bread and getting peanut butter to spread on toast and then stretching my hardest to sit down comfortably, and so on, I was actually burning a lot of calories and was very proud of the fact that I was losing weight.  But I paid heed to the advice of my surgeon. In the third appointment, since I had no pain, I was urged to wean away from the Aircast within a week. There was no evidence of even the start of healing, hence no soft callous and consequently not even the hint of hard callous forming. My foot was a little swollen but had come some ways from blue black bruising to weakening of that color.   I was asked to return in 7 weeks because the healing had not budged.  We were buying time…. But what the jeepers! Almost 2 months more of waiting?

This was it!  I knew it was time to let my wings get me to India; I could not wait any longer.  So, I booked my flights and decided that it was time to hop in the car and drive somewhere even with my fractured foot to do some last minute shopping.  Now, that was first too with a fractured foot, for me at any rate!

At the Vancouver airport, I had the utmost fun and glee riding on a wheel chair and then an airport buggy (like a golf cart). That was a first too.  Sitting with a friendly driver of this cart, Michael, with a couple at the back, off we went speeding through the lanes of Vancouver airport to my gate to get me to Hong Kong.  The little girl in me popped out as I sat in excitement devouring the scenes of the airport.  At Hong Kong airport, I was shown into a wheel chair and the friendly Lam took me to gate 503.  I even took pictures of these two happy people.

There’s quite a lot to be said about sitting in a wheel chair and everything being taken care of.  I was in and out of lines in a jiffy, security check was taken care of partially by the wheel chair attendants, and I was among the first to board and about the last to deplane. Anyone seeing me with the austere cast made way for me, asked if they can accompany me to wherever I had ventured to walk up to, or asked if they could get something for me.

But I have one thing to say.  I had to swallow an ego-reducing pill to be able to do this.  My children had severely instructed me not to be foolhardy to try to walk and carry my bags on my own, but to take help in the airport and aircraft as needed.  The second point I want to make is stemming from what I have heard about wheelchair access.  I am appalled that some people may be just lazy and thus ask to be wheeled between gates at an airport. I had taken my hospital reports with me in case authorities at the departing airport wanted to see evidence of my fracture and need for a wheel chair!  Needless to say, that was not needed.

Well, I should end here on some of my firsts in the past few months.  Enjoy!

Perhaps you can write about your firsts and start posting on your blogs…. Cheers!

-Jagjit

Been a long time again

To the blogsite and my reader friends-

Wish you a very happy new year and I really mean ‘happy’.  Its not just a cliche.

Phew! Its been a long time, but I am back!

I think I got too busy and engrossed in things (work mostly :)), then just fell off the wagon, and struggled a bit to stand up, straighten myself, and run along the tracks to get on to the sturdy train. It happens; what d’ ya say?

So, much has happened since I posted my last blog.  From big set backs to some small ones derailed me.  I was devoid of time and inspiration to blog for more than a year.  I have taken a U-turn now and will post some of my thoughts and experiences in recent months.

Much has transpired in the world – from Canadian elections with young Justin Trudeau as Prime Minister, US elections with Donald Trump waiting to take on Presidency, to demonetization in India by Indian Prime Minister Narender Modi, to climate calamities and war disasters around the world, and more.  We take everything in our stride with smiles or frowns and move on.  Some of us do nothing while others become activists…We go through hard times but bounce back; there IS no other way.  Many rejoice…. there is much to be thankful about; yes?

Nevertheless, life is beautiful.  It is a pleasure and gratifying to be alive and kicking.  With that in mind and spirit, I welcome you all!

A leader- that’s you!

‘Oh, really?  But, how can you call me a leader?  I am not a boss or manager or even a supervisor!  I am not even a leader in my group of friends!’

Now, isn’t that how some of us feel?  Then, how can we reconcile with the title of this blog?

What if we don’t have the responsibility to lead anyone?  Then, how can one be a leader?  The point I am making is that each one of us is a leader in our own right. We can certainly be our own leader.  That is self-leadership!

Very intriguing thought!  Have you ever considered yourself to be a leader of yourself?  You think, you reflect, you motivate yourself, you set goals for yourself, you monitor your progress towards your goals, you problem solve, and so on.  You also assess yourself all the time, don’t you?  You have aspirations that you will rise to the top, that you will do something wonderful one day, that you should get your degree and get working to excel in your field of endeavor, that whatever your passion, you are able to achieve the very best.  Now with all that within your repertoire, can’t you say that, indeed, you are a leader?

Self-leadership takes the view that in order to succeed in the world around us, we have to gain mastery over our internal world- our private world of our emotions, thoughts, feelings, beliefs, values, fears, strengths, weaknesses, etc…  How do we do that?

Have you heard of Emotional Intelligence?  We may be very intelligent in the conventional IQ sense, which means we have done well at university, are able to problem solve, and have been very successful at solving academic and technical problems at work, school and home.  However, come a stressful or novel situation, we tend to fly off the handle, get totally frazzled, become emotional and tear up, and/or basically, lose it.  In such a situation, what good would be our intelligence if we are unable to control our emotions and instead of solving the problem and accomplishing our goal, we ruin the situation as a result?  Probably, zilch!

So, a critical part of self-leadership would be self-awareness, self-monitoring, self-management, and self-control, and also awareness and understanding of other’s emotions. Being able to empathize with others is a great hallmark for being successful at what we do.  These skills together are termed Emotional Intelligence.  Makes sense? Even the most intelligent folks cannot achieve much if they have little control over their own emotions.  These emotions could be anything from fear, anxiety, jealousy, and sadness to anger, over excitement, over confidence, and over-zealous behavior.  Awareness of our emotions, knowing how we react to situations, and control over these feelings, attitude, thoughts, and behavior are a must if we are to follow our thinking and planning and work towards being successful.  Moreover, understanding why the other person was rude or stressed, or jealous, or sad or even happy, is critical to know how to deal with this person.  Easy said than done, right? And one may ask, why should I be concerned with why the other person displayed the emotion they did?  self-leadership

Simple!  Because we don’t live in a vacuum.  We live in a social world where we are in constant interaction with folks.  We discuss, plan, advise, scold, inform, ask, question.  We love, hold, hug, hate, dislike.  We laugh, tease, joke, etc.  What impact has all our interactions on ourselves and others?  What impact has their emotions and behavior on us?  How can we monitor the effects of other’s behavior on us such that we are able to control ourselves and be a leader of oneself?  Self-awareness is ever so important!

For a leader of others, all these are paramount skills to have.  However, for a leader of oneself, these skills are as significant, if not more!  Think about it!  What was the last time you were going to nail a job, but you got nervous answering a question, and you became flustered, losing the job?  Do you ever wonder what kind of raise you may have acquired had you not been rude to your boss?  Do you remember the last time you were making a presentation, you blew it because you had a panic episode?  Do you wish you had never gotten so angry at your spouse, that she or he called it quits?

Self-leadership is about knowing what needs to be done and accomplishing your goals.  Yes, you are a leader and you better know it!  Self-leadership is one aspect of leadership.  But, I am sure you have also been responsible for influencing, guiding, motivating, leading your friends, classmates or family towards accomplishing a task- whether it was making a meal at home, driving your friends to an important meeting, providing valuable ideas for a class project, or driving a sick friend to the hospital.

So, this is another aspect of leadership– that of influencing others and helping them accomplish goals.  I will mouse away my thoughts on this in my next blog!

Take care and happy self-leading!!

  • Jagjit

The Gold Rush…. What? Where?

Yes, yes, the gold rush!  Is there one?  Where?

Oh, actually I was watching ‘The Gold Rush’ as I was fervently cycling away at the gym yesterday. I did not know then, but later as I checked out its details on the internet, The Gold Rush is a 1925 silent comedy film, written, produced, and directed by Charlie Chaplin himself.

Charlie Chaplin was hilarious as usual.  He is a gold explorer, a brave but weak Lone Prospector, competing with strong men vying for the gold during the Klondike Gold Rush.  It was a scene where Charlie is saved by Big Jim from the clutches of a competitor (Black Larsen, I think). Big Jim and Charlie doze off in this cabin after celebrating their victory over Black Larsen and have a heavy booze night. They sleep so soundly that they do not realize what hits them at night.  A heavy blizzard dislodges the entire cabin off the ground and sweeps it through the snowy and icy plains to the edge of a cliff!  Actually, almost over the cliff.

In the morning, Charlie wakes up from his deepest slumber and oblivious to his surroundings, he gets up to walk to the washroom, I suppose.  Lo and behold, the cabin tilts a bit (it was about half over the cliff, you see) and petrified out of his wits, he wonders if he had eaten too much and drunk too much the night before.  He thinks that he was having a bad hangover!

charlie chap
From: Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Gold_Rush

He wakes up Jim who also feels weird because of the see-saw effect in the wobbling cabin!  The two stand at either side of the house, inside, causing the log cabin to tilt back and forth, while the jokers remain clueless at what is happening.  Eventually, Jim who was big and sturdy, slides onto the same side as Charlie, and the cabin shifts some more over the cliff precariously hanging by a very tiny bit.  Its door flings open, and out slides Charlie…..!

While all this was going on, what was I doing in the gym on the bike? Going past my normal speed with my heart racing to 128.  I was in splits laughing my head off and thinking of our snowy winter in Canada.  By that time, I realized I had done 1 and half times the distance and speed that I normally do and was time to slow down!

Charlie and The Gold Rush brought back memories!  It was so good to laugh and enjoy the simple yet artful humor in Charlie Chaplin’s movies. This particular film was supposed to be one that Charlie wanted to be best remembered for!

If you can, do watch it with your family and have an evening of laughter and togetherness!

—  Jagjit

Are you a Winner or Victim?

When life throws you a curveball, what do you do?  You duck and rejoice, get hit and moan, or catch it swing it back.  The fourth choice you have is to get hit, save yourself, savor the lessons it teaches, and grow from the experience. 

There is no dearth of difficulties in people’s lives.  There is no one on this planet that hasn’t had at least one googly (to use another term for this fun life experience!) thrown at them.  People can get horrendously sick, some lose their job or/and their home, some experience awful flooding in which their belongings disappear into the sea.  A loved one dies, a loved one cheats on you, an enemy pays you a nasty visit, you fail your exams, friends break up, and your house collapses due to strong earthquake….  You have an accident and total your car, and you end up with a whiplash, etc, etc…. you get what I mean?  Things that happen to us- there is an endless list of possibilities.  All of us have experienced one or the other or more than one!

“We have to be winners, not losers”, I quipped, sitting in my doctor’s office one day.  Funny that he reminded me of that just the other day!  How do we ‘win’ in these circumstances? How do we win after a flood, or when my car is totally damaged and I am injured?  Who wins when friends break up or a marriage breaks up?  Or when you have a shouting spree with your spouse?  There is really no winner in that one!

Nah!  It’s not about winning here – as in winning a gold medal or coming on top of a class. It is really about having a winning attitude and a positive outlook.  If I lose all my belongings in a flood or in an earthquake, I am not going to feel very good for a long time.  So, what can I do?  Or if I lose my job and my salary that comes with it, what then?  Rest assured, first – I will not believe that it happened to me.  I will be angry, terribly angry!  With who? Whoever comes in my way and perhaps, God! Then, I will be absolutely depressed because it seems like the end of the world is upon me.  And you want me to be a winner?  How is that possible?

Seriously speaking, what we may try to do is to pick up the pieces after the initial shock and after-effects have passed.  Whatever happens, a winner accepts responsibility for his/her actions, a winner thinks ahead and plans for success, has a positive attitude and sees situations as challenges to grow and develop from, rather than be a complainer and whiner.  A winner tries to excel and constantly improve and surrounds themselves with optimism and positive people.  A loser or victim has the mentality of “why me?” Instead of taking responsibility for their actions, they blame others and expect the worst from people and experiences.

Easier said than done!  How can I feel strong and ready to take positive action after a calamity has befallen me?  From my experiences, I have seen that if I sulk and feel bad about something, those feelings will drag me down further.  I have seen the ‘Poor me’ attitude of many folks and what do they achieve?  Nothing much except negativity, conflict, heightened anxiety, and ill health.  So, why not give the benefit of doubt to life’s curveballs and start to think like there is a wonderful life at the end of tunnel?  That wonderful outcome can come today, tomorrow, or 10 years hence.  But it will come and in the meantime, with positive attitude- an attitude of a winner, one can start looking up and gain strength.  We often heard the saying- ‘No pain, no gain’.  This one makes sense when you are having a hard workout in the gym, by the way!

Using this maxim in our life’s experiences, isn’t it best take any instance of pain as a challenge to learn and grow from?  If we take care of our present, our future and our past will fall in line!  Have a winner’s attitude, think positive, surround yourself with optimistic people, accept the curveballs and googlies with open arms and an open mind, and thank your lucky stars you received a chance to become a better and stronger person!

Toodle-doo!

— Jagjit